You don’t need a recipe to build something beautiful.
In both the kitchen and in life, many of us require recipes to get something accomplished. A cookbook, a guidebook, an instruction manual, you name it; and there are probably rules advising on how to do that thing best. Although, we actually can do all things through the power in our minds due to the mere fact we aren’t fucking helpless robots, who require bulleted lists on how to get from A to B. This is something that I learned subconsciously from my Mother at a young age. Say what you want about the effectiveness of those little booklets the company includes inside the packaging trying to make your life simpler, but my Mom used those scraps of paper to stuff between logs in our fire pit. I honestly have never opened one of them myself; and I’m sure I probably could’ve saved a lot of time and hair pulling out trying to assemble a DIY bed frame or desk. But that’s exactly the point, when you manage to ‘do it yourself’ you’ve surmounted the small minded capitalists that think we’re all chickens running around with our heads cut off.
When speaking about actual food recipes, how juvenile it is to assume the person who wrote that cook book didn’t just throw a bunch of ingredients in a bowl and say ‘presto this shit’s delish’. Of course they did, that’s what all ‘recipes’ are. A random combination of food that tastes good together and someone once before tried it out and thought to themselves that all the lazy, helpless people of the world need these collected in book form because it will make their existence more boring, and in doing so, easier. Millions of dollars have been made because people are more creative than you. That makes me feel terrible, but I’m quite sure many are entirely content with this understanding. Again, I never saw my Mother touch a recipe book other than the visibly aged piece of paper scribbled with our Nana’s special biscotti recipe during Christmas time. But personally speaking we would be doing that glorious woman a disservice by mixing in the wrong amount of flour. Nevertheless, my mom was always a fantastic cook. Although I’ve never been a fan of pork, it did smell damn good and everyone else at the table thoroughly enjoyed it. Vegetables of all sorts sautéed in whatever resided inside the spice cabinet, delicious blends of potatoes of various shapes, colors, and sizes sometimes baked and sometimes broiled. Whatever dinner was, it never had a formal name, it just simply was things that taste good, and then thrown together to make a symphony of flavor, creative flavor. That’s just it, we were created to create; not just follow one part sugar and two parts salt dragging our index finger over the physical manifestation of someone else’s profit.
Regardless of this matter, constructing wheely office chairs, or Martha Stewart’s famed rhubarb pie is not the point. I want to drill the comprehension of ‘we are not useless, uncreative losers who need to rely on really rich people to tell us of how to put two and two together’ into everyone’s brainwashed mind. A widespread understanding now, is that doing something by yourself is apparently so taboo that they actually include instructions on the back of sunscreen bottles. Are we actually serious humans? Do we really not know how to apply sunscreen? Well let me tell you this if your answer was yes to that last question, I can bet you will figure it out as your skin progressively reddens over the course of the beach day. Why on God’s green earth were we blessed with a mind that can think independently and creatively, if we are just collectively deciding now to… just not? We decide not to because we now have the capability to sue the company who sold us that sunscreen and didn’t provide explicit instructions on how to apply it to our skin!
I say stop this blasphemous cycle. I am no genius, no magician, not swimming in cash nor luck at that. But, I have pride in giving myself the opportunity to succeed by myself. I find myself craftier than others of my same sex, and age because I am possibly a budding professional at figuring things out alone by choice, and by the result of stubbornness. If the drain is clogged I find a way to unclog it using some McGiever contraption of cutlery and maybe the thin handle of a wooden spoon. If my sunglasses break because the little screw was jiggled loose and set free, I grab a paper clip and eyebrow tweezers and jam it through the corresponding holes made for that little screw and then clamp it shut! I make some of the best dinners I have ever eaten with nothing other than hunger to guide me through whatever’s left in the pantry. But, I also feel resourcefulness has a lot to do with how cheap and lazy you are. If the drain is clogged, call a plumber! Sunglasses broken? Hit up Amazon for next day delivery. Hungry? Track your take out pizza on the Dominos App!
It’s unfortunate to see this subconsciously accepted by so many, and even more troubling to see my mother getting older each year still caulking windows in the winter and cleaning gutters, dwindling on a ladder in the spring. Nevertheless, she obtains something that I feel a lot of men fear and woman envy, she never needed anyone else and built a life for her children that has been seamlessly beautiful for me, and agonizingly painful at times for her. Yet, knowing that I lived smooth sailing, is a satisfying side effect to all her hard work and determination for solutions. I believe this will be something I too will put into practice, as I grow more into adulthood and further from my momma’s nest. Which, in this world of going to the emergency room for a broken toe or summoning a gardener even when you have time and two hands, is a very valuable trait.
In the summers, my Mom and I would stand in the drive way with tennis rackets in hand, patiently waiting for those nesting carpenter bees on the south side of our shingled home to make an appearance, and took care of the issue quite nicely and never once was an exterminator bothered about the matter. Also, let’s not forget my mother perfected her backhand swing for her self proclaimed tennis career.
It just takes a little bit of creativity, and the willingness to make something happen because you think you can. No one ever got anywhere believing they couldn’t. I urge you to try to use your brain and maybe solidify something for yourself that didn’t come with an instruction manual.
Traveling is something I didn’t learn from my Mother, but fortunately the same traits are applicable more often than not. The best and most memorable times I had traveling Europe were the sites barren without tourists, lost with random strangers I met in a hostel, wandering along with powerless cell phone’s with my boyfriend, or uncalled for suggestions from a local to try a certain tapas place around the corner. I believe the best times are the ones not on the itinerary; that then allows the universe to do it’s job. Attracting things to you that you will find most worth wild, that maybe you wouldn’t have done, having not taken the metro going the wrong direction or leaving your phone in a cab. The most important aspect I think, is to remain calm and loosen your grip, because maybe some unexpected magic is about to take place and you missed it because you decided to see every main attraction the airport pamphlet had to offer in the city and passed out before the sun even set. In Paris my favorite part was not the Love Lock Bridge, or even the Eiffel Tower but how the autumn sun glistened over the Seine in late afternoon and turned each drop of water to gold shimmering pools. Or when my boyfriend and I randomly walked into a cathedral to avoid he wind, and the Notre Dame gave us an unexpected, and mesmerizing full out organ performance. In Prague, there are a congregation of probably 50 swans under the bridge if you walk south down the river and the smallest Kurtoskalancs joints in the narrow streets under the castle are better than the fancy ones in the main square. In Barcelona, Park Guell was amazing of course, but our hosts who offered the most accepting hugs and fun filled nights during our short stay made the trip. In Berlin, it wasn’t the bombed stained buildings or bullet littered columns that grabbed my attention, but that I randomly found myself an American, eating at a Russian restaurant, with my Romanian boyfriend, on the previously German occupied side of the wall. In the Canary Islands, I didn’t even touch the pristine beach once, but enjoyed laughter filled nights of wine and stories on the rooftop with people from Bulgaria, Canada, Syria, America, Italy, Israel, Germany and Slovenia. Things have certainly gone wrong and very rocky while hopping from country to country for me, but one thing I keep in my mind always is, I will figure it out and at the end, all will be well and good. You are always exactly where you need to be.
It is not always planned, not always organized, they may not speak English and you might not have enough time, the fold out couch is missing a pole, and maybe a pipe is leaking in the upstairs bathroom, but it is all written. Each troubling or difficult experience is something strengthening you for what’s coming next. What’s to happen if you choosily avoid all difficult circumstances and then encounter one where you have no alternative other than to deal with, and you just don’t know how to do anything for yourself and collapse in failure? That would be awful, and I would hate for you to discover that harsh reality. But you don’t have to. We all were born into a society and convinced of the norms of that society, we grew up copying others and following the crowds in order to be accepted and “liked”. Just because everyone else wants to do something because it’s easier and therefore more appealing, but your soul is tugging you in the opposite way, I challenge you to answer the calling. No one says you need to be an outcast and shun all areas of normalcy in life but take small steps to mental independence in your own way. Engaging in activities that give you power is one example of how to raise your vibration higher toward the realm of enlightened consciousness. Paint, sing, build, run, stretch, walk, sit, breath, hold, balance, or just be. Connect with the inner you, connect with the capable being that resides in all of us. We are creative, boundless individuals with a super computer as a brain. Let’s all stop pretending we need the GPS on highway’s with signs and microwaveable dinners when veggies at the market are cheaper and healthier.
It doesn’t help that American society has built it’s overbearing economy on making the lives of it’s people stupid simple easy. The generations having children now don’t know how to even change a tire, I don’t even know how to change a tire. It’s undeniably difficult to try and cultivate basically an entire generation of people spanning world wide, that ditching plastic to be sustainable for the earth is a good idea; because it inevitably will require an elevated exertion of effort from those individuals. Why is being lazy so preferable? We all want to be healthy and happy, but being healthy isn’t getting Smoothie Take Out, and one less piece of pizza, it’s an investment and devotion to yourself, take your time. Happiness comes in many forms as well, but let’s not forget the satisfaction that comes from facilitating your own success, large or small. Don’t think you are worthless, and please don’t let your inner flame be extinguished by lazy rudimental society. My life has become so unbelievably abundant and magnificent since I decided to start showing up for myself, and giving my all to every thing I set my mind to. How you choose to show up, magnetizes what shows up for you.
You can do it.